one for the mind

i hate getting up thinking what my day will be or what will happen to me. thinking is what i hate the most. thinking about my life, thinking who will be it or when will be the day. you see, when i thought i found the right one, i thought i could do things that will make her feel comfortable. things that i dont normally do with my friends. the way i talk. as i learned before, the L word is a strong word. no hard feelings, but it is. being in that state totally sux max. you will do stuff that you think will make her happy, in order words, to make your day but hell no. if you dont think twice or even rationally, the stuff that you did will actually screw things up or even make your 'day'. you will regret for life, thinking,"why the fark i did that?" or maybe "i shouldnt have done that". well, i guess we all say it when we screw things up. im not saying that falling in **** (mind my censorship) is a bad thing, but we have to know something.is it worth it?will it happen? obviously we want it to happen dont we but will it happen if we rush things. ah yes..rushing too is another killer! rushing things with someone will eventually take you no where!been there done that! id learned alot from before.well i should thank her.lol.ok thats bad!!!ill take that back! anyway, ill always cherish those times we had before! about the past, it really taught me alot of things. things i now know. things that i shouldnt do. things that i can do to make it possible. we just have to make our previous ones as a lesson to us. use it and apply it then. we will then know is actually beneficial!as for me now, i know what i have to do and what i must do. i want to work things out. theres always a lesson to be learned. we are growing up. its ok when we make mistakes, just learned from them. as we progress along, we know what to do and what not to. as long we can differentiate whats right and whats wrong. sigh!life sux sometimes though!!toodles.
-tat-